Instead, you want a simple phone that doesn’t have an internet connection and can be bought for cash either in a 7/11 or a store like Best Buy. On top of this, they’re internet-connected too, so your location is easy to find if you use applications like Facebook and Instagram.īasically, a smartphone is really easy to track.Īnd if you’re wanting to get off the grid, or avoid the authorities, you do not want any of this. You need to learn from your own mistakes.Smartphones also have GPS, so you can track their location. "You need to learn your own - how do I put this? - discipline. "When I'm in high school, that might get embarrassing sometimes, you know?" she says. The soon-to-be eighth-grader appreciates that "she cares about me," but hopes Mom will eventually "back up" a bit. But she did tell Mom what happened soon after.Īyrial still isn't happy that her mom is going through her contacts with her. She had sidestepped a block on social media by using a tablet. ![]() It was a "creepy" request, the teen said, that caused her to end the connection quickly. Recently, Ayrial started a live videostream on Twitter and encountered a stranger who asked her to show her bare feet. Wistocki tells parents to offer their children the "Golden Ticket" - no punishment when they come to them about mistakes they've made online or help they need with a social media problem.Īyrial's mom is all for that. "I'm almost to the point where I feel like the world would be better off without social media," says Wisniewski, who studies human computer interaction and adolescent online safety. But Pam Wisniewski, a computer-science professor at the University of Central Florida, suggests a gradual loosening of the strings as teens prove they can be trusted. Tech experts agree that monitoring makes sense for younger kids. But I don't have the same problems as other people do."Ī 2016 Pew Research Center survey found that only about half of parents said they had ever checked their children's phone calls and text messages or even friended their kids on social media. "People laugh at me because I monitor her stuff. She turns off certain apps, sometimes as punishment, and monitors texts. While searching his phone, they also found photos of other partially nude girls in a secret photo vault app disguised as a calculator.Īnd yet, Wistocki says, too often parents remain in denial with what he calls "NMK - not my kid."īivens, Ayrial's mom uses an app called MMGuardian, one of several available, to manage and monitor her 13-year-old daughter's phone use. ![]() Last year in Naperville, a 16-year-old killed himself after police discovered that he'd recorded himself having sex with a classmate and then shared the recording with his hockey teammates. In January, two 12-year-olds were arrested in Panama City Beach, Florida, for cyberstalking that police said led to the suicide of a classmate named Gabriella Green, who'd been repeatedly bullied. Such journeys can lead to ugly incidents, sometimes involving surprisingly young participants. You can drive to Texas, Florida, New York, wherever you want to go." Wistocki often holds up a mobile phone and tells wide-eyed parents that giving a kid this "ominous device" is like handing over the keys to a new Mercedes and saying, "Sweetheart you can go to Vegas. Parents, by contrast, are both overwhelmed and often naive about what kids can do with sophisticated devices. But academics, experts like Wistocki and Coffey, and many teens themselves say it's surprisingly common for kids to live online lives that are all but invisible to most parents.Įxposed to tablets and smartphones at an increasingly early age, kids are correspondingly savvier about using them and easily share tips with friends. It's difficult to say how many kids are pushing digital boundaries this way. ![]() "I gotta hand it to their creativity, but it's only enabled through technology," says Coffey, chief digital officer at IDShield, a company that helps customers fend off identity theft.
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